A Pathetic Literary Foray

With apologies to Paul Henning and Flatt & Scruggs, I offer this little ditty about Virginia's favorite flake and Governor wannabe, Senator Russ "Chamber" Potts (RINO-Winchester), to the tune of the "The Ballad of Jed Clampett," theme song from The Beverly Hillbillies:

The Ballad of the Winchester Billygoat

Let me tell you a little story about a man named Russ,
A poor mountain boy, known mainly as full o' pus,
And then one day, he was rootin' through a pile,
And up through his throat, came a' bubblin' bile
("Governor, I'll be; mansion; higher taxes; far right! far right!")

Well the first thing you know old Russ's got a goal
Media folk said "Russ, the people gotta know'd"
Said "Ole Richmond is the place you oughta be"
So he loaded up his truck and he went out on the road
(interstates, that is, gridlock, obscene finger gestures)

Well now it's time to say goodbye to Russ and all his bile
He'd like to thank you folks for lettin' him drop a pile
You're all invited back again to this locality
To have a heaping helping of his generosity
(Chamber Potts; taxpayer handouts is what he's for,
Nice media folks Y'all come back now, ya hear?)

Starring: Russ "Chamber" Potts as himself
Jeff Schapiro of the Richmond Times-Dispatch as "Jethro"
Leslie Byrne as "Granny"
Sean Connaughton as "Ellie Mae"
Marc Fisher of the Washington [com]Post as "Miss Jane Hathaway"
and Barnie Day of the Augusta Free Press as "Mr. Drysdale"